Children lie to their elders it’s a fact, and they do it often to get away with things that could annoyed others. However, what these little kids don’t know that adults are ahead of them in detecting a lie. In the long time, if lying becomes a habit, it could lead to a faulty personality.
So, it is important to draw the line between the good and the bad and help kids to learn good principles to be a better human being, and speak the truth.
10 more ways can help your child become a good person:
Never lie in front of your child:
Kids watch the things around them and learn parents or teacher never says them to lie so parents should be very particular in their actions and behaviour when around your child. Don’t lie to your friends or neighbours and spouse in front of your child.
Setting the right example:
Parents should accept the fact that their child might lie to them at one point of time or the other and it is not wrong and crime. Be a good role model first before expecting the same from the child. This is because children catch behaviour and attitudes by seeing their parents,’ says Dr Pavan Sonar, Consultant Psychiatrist, Riddhivinayak hospital, Mumbai.
Don’t lie to your child ever:
Be realistic about the promises you make to your child and fulfil them. If you can’t oblige to your child’s unnatural demands be assertive with a ‘no’.
Always stand for the truth:
It might not have a direct impact but will help your child learn the value of truth through your actions.
Confronting a lie:
The harsh truth is that contempt your efforts, dedication and affection towards your child, he might still lie to you. ‘When this happens doesn’t lose your temperament. Instead, understand that if your child is lying to you there might be some underlying issue that is stopping him from telling the truth. It is important to go to the depths of the situation to rectify it at the surface,’ says Dr Sonar.
Stay calm and talk:
‘If you get angry on your child because of a lie then stop it and beware, it could close all routes of communication. Your child might be scared to talk to you about the truth anyway,’ says Dr Sonar. Once you recognise a lie try to be calm and talk to your child.
Confront in a non-threatening way:
Sometimes it happens that a child lies to save his sibling or friend from a situation, other times it would be clearly to shrug off mistakes like forgetting to do homework or a more severe one like robbing stationary from a friend. In either case, shouting and beating will not help and not a good idea. But if a lie is to save someone from a situation, console your child and then tell him why lying, instead of his good intentions.
If your child lies to you accept the situation no matter what your expectations are from your kid. Sit with him and tell him why you think that what he said wasn’t the truth and reason out with him. Don’t force kids to speak the truth immediately, make them comfortable and create a situation so he can trust you.
Teaching the right lessons:
To lie is a bad habit still if chid is picking and keeping in habit then it’s a time to teach a good lesson for this .So that kid can realise his fault and never repeat again.
Improve communication with your child:
Child can lie to an elder when he /she are finding some gap or miscommunication between the two. It is important to improve communication between you and your child, talk more to your child regularly. You can talk about everything under the sun and also about the previous lies that he had spoken. Communication will help your child be more co-operating and invest towards you, even when he has committed a mistake.
Motivate your child to speak the truth:
Sometimes kids might lie to you because the truth could be upsetting, especially towards someone in the family (in case of victims of sexual abuse); try to be sympathetic during such situations. Apart from giving only assurance, give lots of love, hugs and cuddle your child to open up to you with ease.
Practise storytelling with morals:
Story telling with morals can also help to improve your kid’s habits. Many stories with morals that explain in a child-friendly manner that telling a lie isn’t a good habit.
Talk to a psychiatrist:
If kids are lying can becomes a habit in your child, in that condition talk to a psychiatrist to take the necessary steps in helping your child get back on track, else it can be harmful later.
How lying can affect a child:
‘Mainly children use lying as a coping method for survival. It can damage his, relationship with family and peers. Later, lying can also affect his personality and character,’ says Dr Sonar. Hence, it is important to ensure that your child doesn’t make lying a life-long habit.